An audible silence consumed the packed Moscone conference centre today as Steven P Jobs took to the stage with all the confidence and swagger of a young Keith Richards, completely billy bollocks.
In a stunning departure from his legendary jeans and black turtle neck, Jobs’ reality distortion field was in full swing! All 10 inches of it.
In what some experts are cynically calling a, “publicity stunt” to divert attention away from mediocre MacBook updates and an embarrassing withdrawal from the mobile market place on the back of, “poorer than expected” iPhone sales.
An open mouthed press core and faithful Apple fanboys we’re visibly stunned. In an interview with attendees after the keynote many refused to believe Mr Jobs was in-fact naked and instead insisted, “if you can’t see his clothes your not a true believer.”